A Fun Cup

So I have been sick since Sunday...and its not a cold. Its further south than that, but that is not the point of today's post. I have not been able to eat much in the past few days and today is the first day that I am trying to eat a little more than 500 calories. It doesn't seem to be working out too well. However, I am able to hold down more water than I have been. I am not sure if it is because I am feeling better or if it is all because of my new cup!
A few days ago...erm...sometime last week, I bought me a cool Tervis cup! Its a "Salt Life" cup, orange, with a sea turtle on it. The only way it could be more perfect for me is if it were green. I think it may be what is making me drink more water. So everyone, you want to know the secret to drinking more water? Drink it out of a cool cup! Not only is it fun, but it is helping save the environment!

Tonight..it burns...

Ok so not really. More like my mind, it bothers. It plagues... I have never felt as alone as I feel today and I know why. Though I got to talk to the man I want to be with and my family, my best friend told me that she is ok with dying in herself and that is why she won't use her C-Pap machine. How fucked up is it? She is ok with passively committing suicide! But I'm not ok with it and trying to talk to her about was pissing her off. I have no one to talk to about it, or no one here to pat my back or something to say "It's going to be ok." I kinda want to rip my hair out. She and I have been best friends since we were 6 and 7 years old, so for her to say something like that was a shocking blow to my reality.


I don't know if I can talk about it anymore.










I need a drink...